everything awsome ever

Sat, 17 Oct 2009 06:51:48 GMT

Sometimes, I feel like I'm not solid. I'm hollow; there's nothing behind my eyes. I'm a negative of a person ” as if I never thought anything, never wrote anything, never felt anything. All I want is blackness ” blackness and silence

Thu, 26 Feb 2009 20:30:17 GMT

no much going on. mid terms this week they suck. ive been studying non stop.

my bands going on tour for a week during spring break. we actually got on a lot of pretty good shows im really stoked. ive never toured before and its always been on the to do list so its time to get wasted in some new city. im really stoked to see D.C.

The watchmen comes out next week. it will rule.

i think its time i stop writing in this thing. and reading it. im not learning much about people i have much of an interest in. so.

good day live journal this is my last entry.

its been nice knowing you since 10th grade. i ofter wrote in you like a teenage girl writes in an actual diary. it is most embarrassing. so it is time to cease.

Thu, 12 Feb 2009 21:53:20 GMT

my brain is fried

Mon, 15 Dec 2008 20:03:33 GMT

sometimes i wonder why i wake up and i say to myself "
Jesse, what the fuck are you doing with your life" Then i read livejournal and i think what the fuck are these people doing with their lives. this makes me realize all of these questions are just relative. If all of you picture posting pose taking people are "living" I really hope im already dead and just dreaming about how wacky you fuckers look

Thu, 04 Dec 2008 23:10:06 GMT

so any of you weirdos that still read about my life....come to this show and see my new band ripper

Mon, 17 Nov 2008 21:13:31 GMT

come see this new band ripper im in play a show.

if you really love me youll come

Mon, 06 Oct 2008 04:44:42 GMT

im drukn i want weed.....

jacksonville sucks...a lot...

milhouse rules
madden ruless

fuck why did the jags lose

Sat, 23 Aug 2008 00:15:48 GMT

dear jacksonville.

where is my house

im out of town and im wondering if its floating away. if all of my stuff is ruined.

oh well fuck it NEW ORLEANS RULES AHHHHHHHHHH BURBON STREET HAND GRENADES BITCH!!!!!!!!

Tue, 29 Jul 2008 23:10:07 GMT

donnie and darius update a lot more than me.

i dont want them to be above or better than me at anything so im going to update more as well

my life is pretty cool

i dont like jacksonville very much because its boring and i dont like a lot of people and i act really bitter. but ive been doing a better job at hanging with people like jon clay and calliahn who i love like a homosex but never would call

a girl just yelled at ben for kicking his dog and i heard it from the other room. i currently am laughing
i hope that darius and donnie read that and remember the time a girl yelled at ben for kicking a dog and laugh to themselves.

Mon, 16 Jun 2008 21:14:19 GMT

fuck....so...fucking bored ...all the fucking time

everyday i get wicked stoned and im STILL FUCKING BORED

this sucks

i need a hobby. or just some shit to do. not like work type shit. just some fun shit.

like seriously im about to leave work go home and play x men legends. not even x men legends 2 or any kind of new video game. just some old ass game i found for ps2. and why? simply becaues i have no idea what else to do as my mind is completely smoked and out of ideas.

see nothing in particular entertains me. or interest me. ever. im not sure why it is.if i could force my self to be really happy when i see shiny stuff or something that makes a loud noise without question i would do it. but alas for some reason ive become too bitter or jaded or whatever it is to find any real type of joy in life.

and that blows.

i sit and let time and the world pass me by and watch my stomach become bigger becaues i only wish to eat fast food becaues i want food within the first 35 seconds that i think of it and drink beer which of course has an amazing effect on your gut area.

but what is a guy to do

flat broke...stuck in a town with a bunch of fucking pieces of garbage that i dont want to associate with. its not like i can move and be like well thank goodness i magically transported to wonderful land where everything is perfect.

NOT TO FUCKING MENTION its hot outside. fuck how hot it is that shit is soooo gay. who the fuck decided it was best to settle my family in fucking hot ass florida. i got fair skin i dont want to fucking turn into the danger ranger (a large red object that doesnt move).

im not exactly sure why i wrote this but that is whats been on my mind recently i know donnie and darius are the only people who are going to read this anyways so...hi guys. see ya later

Mon, 19 May 2008 18:38:39 GMT

sometimes i read about these peoples lives and i feel like im a 100 years old.

Thu, 17 Apr 2008 19:39:11 GMT

schools almost out. that rules. im super busy though with finals and what not. that blows

monday i partied pretty hard all over darius's life.

i've been reading a lot more lately and watching a lot of the office with katie. having a girlfriend is pretty cool when you want to be totally lazy. i mean shes real cool other than just being someone that enjoys doing as little as i do. we never fight or anything and shes wicked nice and makes me food.

i got my sweet owen hart tattoo finished yesterday. soon owen will be joined by flair, austin, la parka, and his brother bret in what will become the worlds greatest wrestling icon thigh sleeve.

how has everyone elses life been....i think im at about a 6 out of 10 on the scale of goodness. its best to float in the middle becaues if you get too high on life something sends you back down faster than you can say darius is the new big plugs.

Mon, 07 Apr 2008 16:15:15 GMT

I Philosopy's About Glocks And Keys
Niggas Call Me Young Black Socrates

Mon, 24 Mar 2008 17:33:20 GMT

everyday i wake up...and im not sure what i do or why. but i dont think this is bad im pretty sure its just normal. i dont think any real adult (while i am 20 i in no way am an adult) wakes up every day and understands why they're going to work. and i dont understand why im going to work or school or to hang out with anyone. but i do and i guess its not that bad i would just prefer not to.

i hang out by myself a lot and thats pretty cool

i got a tattoo of owen hart and its way cool.

i am not a nugget...im a black hart damnit a sole survivor WHOO!!!!!

Tue, 11 Mar 2008 21:00:44 GMT

come to this and see my band prunebelly

Tue, 11 Mar 2008 19:13:37 GMT

mosh AND thrasher=the headbangers

Tue, 04 Mar 2008 20:14:51 GMT

i have a crazy conversation last night about mans desire to turn the world into a utopia and how many different kinds of utopias there are.

in my utopia the only things that would exist would be my room,darius, katie, donnie, pot, wrestling+wiltsey, and the history channel.

i kind of already live in my own utopia. i just need to get the history channel again

Mon, 25 Feb 2008 19:35:30 GMT

i saw no use for a name and lucero in one weekend...that ruled

Mon, 18 Feb 2008 18:58:14 GMT

too much school

too little of a chance to bro down

Wed, 23 Jan 2008 22:40:25 GMT

i saw hot water music on saturday...then chuck ragan and ben nichols the very next night. this weekend was pretty fucking awesome.

im moving this weekend i think and that sucks. i hate packing.

but im looking foward to creating the bongatorium

hope all of you in live journal land are doing well.

Mon, 14 Jan 2008 19:55:29 GMT

update-i have decided to move to the black neighborhood and have also decided that i should not be fearful about this. also i should not use the ignorance of few to judge entire groups of people becaues that would be ignorance on my behalf. so my almost racist internal commentary that i put on livejournal previously is now old news. i have come to the realization i just really hate too much.

all of you reading this. have a good day

Thu, 10 Jan 2008 18:55:50 GMT

Ok, so I have a story for all of you and its been something that i havn't been able to stop thinking about. Last night Dan and I went to look at this new house we were thinking of moving into soon. This house is in a semi-bad part of town but not too far from where we already live. I wouldn't consider myself or Dan a racist of any kind. However, on our way there we notice black men walking down the street, a few more black guys hanging out around a gas station, and a crazy, apparently hygene deficient black man on a bike. Instantly we no longer want to live in this house that we had gotten excited about just the night before. We didn't even want to be anywhere near that part of town at that moment and just glanced at the house and then ran away. I just couldn't stop thinking that everyone in this country is fooling themselves into thinking were not racist. We completely deny hating any specific kind of race but, secretly put it in our closets and just try to completely avoid any kind of contact with other races, namely blacks in Jacksonville. I started feeling like a total hypocrit. I started feeling like we as people just pretend to be so much more advanced than we really are. On the inside were just idiots with confederate flag hats on that think "get them damn negros away from me before they steal my dang stereo". But then, on my way to work this afternoon i was enjoying some french fries in the privacy of my own car, while listening to Minor Threats "guilty of being white" ironically enough, then suddenly i look to my left to see a black man driving a busted up Lumina and hes making fun of the way i eat fries and trying to antagonize me for no apparent reason. All the while his lady friend cackels at me from the passenger seat. For some reason this makes me completely feel like garbage and i no longer want to eat fries. Now I am not sure what i feel so bad about. Becaues many of the african americans i encounter in this city are just as ignorant as the red necks that hate them and do just as much as the red necks I also despise do to completely live within their own stereotype. If I consistently hate both sides of the token can I really be considered a racist? But on the same note I feel just as completely ignorant for the way I'm thinking about the entire matter. For instance why should i be concerned with the color of my neighbors in the new home im going to live in. Am i simply no better than a slack jawed hick? I have quite a bit of conflicted feelings on this matter, if you guys want to add your two cents feel free.

Wed, 19 Dec 2007 19:33:17 GMT

pantera is sick....

im obsessed with the old 97s

Fri, 30 Nov 2007 16:02:03 GMT

Standing on the corner of 6th and How To Forget
Trying to do right by you all night Annette
You can go ahead and get married
and this will be our secret thing
I won't tell a soul except the people in the nightclub where I sing

I don't want to get you all worked up
Except secretly I do

I'd be lying if I said I didn't have designs on you

Standing on the corner of 6th and Where do I go
The parade's shut down now the rain is running the show
Where did all these people come from
And how soon can they leave
Normally I'd be into it but I need to get some sleep

Though I do wish you1d come over
But I'm warning you if you do

I'd be lying if I said I didn't have designs on you

Standing on the corner of 6th and Where do I get
Trying to do right by you all night Annette
This would only be an experiment
In things that could have been
You can go ahead and get married
And it'll probably never happen again

I don't mean to make you excited
Except secretly I do

I'd be lying if I said I didn't have designs on you

Wed, 28 Nov 2007 20:23:30 GMT

i think im gonna go to atlanta this winter...

im really thinking about moving up there next fall. i should probably get out of jacksonville and try that whole living far away growing up thing.

but ...

i probably wont because i dont like change...

lifes pretty good